Monday, August 29, 2005 


Like them or not most people know someone with a tattoo. They are as common as earrings now a days. I had a disagreement with a family friend when we were discussing my getting a tattoo. She made the comment that women who get tattoos are prostitutes. She didn't know that I have one and I was offended by this statement

Side Note { Let the record show that I am not, nor have I ever been a prostitute}

I know lots of people with tattoos. Doctors, Cops and even school teachers. Does this make them bad people? NO.

After I made this point she still try to convince me that people with tattoos are loose and that its a ugly practice. This went on for about 40 min, her trying to sway my decision. It didn't work Im still getting a tattoo as soon as I decided what I want. I think deep down she wishes she had the nerve to get a tattoo.


1. How do you feel about tattoos? Why?

2. Do you have one? Where? Of What?

3. Can you Help me out with a suggestion on what to get?


Thursday, August 25, 2005 


I was Tagged by Chrome, But don't worry I didn't tag anyone.... I can take a hint NICKY. LOL

It was still fun to do, so here we go....

Seven Things I…

Plan to Do Before I Die:

1. Travel more
2. Buy a house
3. Go Back to school
4. Have another child…maybe?
5. Fall in love again
6. Feel comfortable in my own skin.
7. Get financially stable

Things I Can Do:

1. Listen
2. Make people laugh
3. Dance… I think?
4. Make a mean Lasagna
5. Shop on a budget
6. Put an outfit together
7. Make a man fall in love

Things I Can’t Do:

1. Say No… when I know someone is in need
2. Hide my anger
3. Stop caring
4. Forget
5. Stop thinking about the past
6. Abandon anyone
7. Forgive myself

Things I say most:

1. The Word FUCK in every variation ( i.e Fuck that , thats fucking stupid etc)
2. Hey Baby
3. What's up?
4. I’m tired
5. Focus
6. Call you later
7. I so don’t want to be here

Things that attract me to the opposite sex
1. Eyes
2. Smile
3. Honesty
4. Sense of Humor
5. Ambition
6. Nice body
7. Kind heart

Celebrity crushes
1. Mark Walberg
2. Boris Kojo
3. Taye Diggs
4. Morris Chesnut
5. John Seda
6. Nick Lachey
7. Brad Pitt

Tuesday, August 23, 2005 


Ok so my good friend is going out with a guy who is good looking, sweet, romantic and totally into her BUT, ....there is always a but.

His but, he wont go “down town” if you know what I mean. That surprised me, but after talking to a few people it turns out that there are still a lot of men out there that won’t go down. So I was thinking WTF? That’s a huge part of sex if you ask me. If your both practicing proper hygiene then what’s the big woop? Just for the record if your man wont go down on you don’t you dare go down on him……they love to have it done to them but then don’t reciprocate, that is some selfish shit!!!!!!!!

I told her to let his ass know and if he wouldn’t budge on the subject to budge his ass out the door!!!!! Now I understand not doing this for everyone cause that to me is something really intimate and should be save for your partner not just the flavor of the week, but if you’re in a relationship with someone you know and trust WHATS THE PROBLEM!!!!!

Is this worth ending a relationship??????? You know my answer.

Monday, August 22, 2005 

I've been Tagged!

Okay, I've been tagged by Cutie Cola. Whomever I tag needs to do the same. here goes!

I tag:

My top ten songs are:
1. Lovely Day- BILL WITHERS
2. I cant Stop Loving you- KEM
3. Bad Habit - DESTINY'S CHILD
4. Shake it Off- MARIAH CAREY
5. Dr. Love – FIRST CHOICE
6. If you Leave me now- CHICAGO
7. Cross my Mind- JILL SCOTT
8. Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Yours- STEVIE WONDER
9. Between the Sheets- THE ISLEY BROTHERS
10. Ride Wit U- JOE

This was hard. I could be here all day but I tried to choose songs that make me happy to hear them .

Have Fun!

Thursday, August 18, 2005 

Men Have It Easy

I was thinking about what to write today but I’m not feeling so great do to my upcoming menstrual cycle and then it hit me.

Women go through a lot. I mean men have it easy.

See women we get screwed with the physical pains of women hood. When your entering puberty and you start sprouting up top, you’re sore and there is not much but they hurt like hell. We get our period. Yeah we get to bleed 5-6 days once a month until we hit menopause. Then with that we get cramps. Yeah we get to get pain with our blood. You spend that week wishing for a BJ Sized bottle of Advil. Not to mention you’re bloated and irritable.

When we don’t have our period usually its cause your pregnant. Now you get to get fat, be nauseas, have heartburn, hemorrhoids, leg spasms and to cap that all off at the very end you’re in labor for what could be hours even days with the worst pain a human being could ever feel. (my opinion)

Just imagine someone dousing your privates with gasoline and setting you on fire or trying to push a watermelon threw the opening the sign of a lemon… You get my meaning!!!!!

What do men get? Blue balls… Big woop!

I tell you in my next life, I’m coming back as a man!

Wednesday, August 17, 2005 

Getting through- with the help of music

We all have music we listen to according to our moods for example

1. When I am feeling in the “mood” I like

1. Sade (greatest Hits)
2. Maxwell
3. Kem (Album II)
4. Jill Scott (Beautifully Human)
5. Prince (scandalous.. need I say more)

2. When I am having a bad day

1. Stevie Wonder (Any and Everything)
2. Earth Wind and Fire (Greatest Hits)
3. Disco /Dance music (its Light and Fluffy)

3. Needing to get over that man

1. Lauren Hill (ex-factor, I used to love him)
2. Heather Headley (I wish I wasn’t)
3. Gloria Gaynor (I will Survive)

4. Getting ampted up to go out

1. Hip-hop
2. Raeggeton

4. Working through some anger

1. Limp bizkit (My Way)

I love all kinds of music and I believe music helps me get through things, that and Cake but that’s a whole other post. LOL

I'm curious to know What helps you through?

Tuesday, August 16, 2005 


After reading everyones comments (Thanks guys!) and thinking it over I have decided that things between my H and I are still very up in the air and I don't want to make the situation even more confusing. I know if I told him this would be " just sex" that he would be hurt and I don't want to hurt him.

* off to take that cold shower (sigh) :-(

Monday, August 15, 2005 


So if you’ve read my blog before you know that my relationship is pretty much non-existant. We are pretty much roommates now. We live in the same house but we don’t share the same bedroom. We talk everyday and have outings with the kids and it all looks perfect. We are the picture perfect family… outside, at home we are still very civil to each other but were friends, at least on my end thats what I feel.

This weekend we decided to go play pool for lack of something better to do and it was fun… Fun like hanging out with your friends fun. So here is the problem. It has been over a month since we had sex and although I consider myself a nun in training (I can go with out sex for a while) when your entering period mode ( ladies you know what I mean) you tend to want it more. I know for a fact he wants to sleep with me.

I’m not going to go out and have sex with just anyone so my question is

1. Is it ok to ask my H for “ just sex”
2. If so how the hell do I go about doing that?
3. Should I just go out and by a new toy?

Sexually frustrated


Thursday, August 11, 2005 

Post Jacking -MY 100

1. Live In NYC
2. Born and raised In Manhattan
3. Grew up as one of the “poor Kids”
4. I had hand-me-downs
5. Hated to go to the store with FOOD STAMPS. LOL
6. I didn’t have name brand sneakers til I hit Junior High
7. I wanted to grow up to be a dancer
8. Favorite shows now “Desperate Housewives”
9. Then Sex in the City
10. I Love Love high heels- 3inch and better
11. I wear heels about 95% of the time
12. I am very girly
13. I like to get my hair and nails done
14. I won’t use the Bathroom (I mean taking a dump) anywhere but home
15. I like to hang out with friends
16. Especially if food and drinks are involved
17. I don’t Trust people easily
18. That’s why I have so few Real Friends
19. I like most types of Music -classic jazz to Rock music and everything in between
20. Love disco… yeah I said disco
21. Love dance music
22. I’ll put on dance music and dance around in my underwear
23. I would love to learn to pole dance
24. Not ass clap
25. Pole dance
26. I have a shit load of Cds
27. Love me some coffee
28. Oh and Pickles. LOL
29. Favorite foods- Mexican, Chinese and Italian preferred
30. I will almost always order Dessert
31. I hate to workout
32. I hate to cook
33. I love ring-dings
34. I love horror movies
35. I like to watch them in the dark
36. Even alone
37. I can recite Godfather I & II word for word
38. Oh and Good Fellas
39. I like Sourpatch kids but only red and orange
40. I hate change
41. First impression are very important to me
42. I know if I like you or not after talking for a few
43. I can keep a secret
44. I think I give pretty good advice
45. I Love to be cuddle
46. I like walks in the park
47. I’m big into romance
48. I never had one romantic moment I can think of
49. That makes me sad
50. I don’t think I will ever have a romantic moment
51. I am Very Loyal
52. I expect loyalty in return
53. I can get jealous
54. Not creating a scene jealous but evil eye jealous
55. I haven’t felt jealous in a long time
56. That makes me sad
57. I love sex
58. Especially when its spontaneous
59. I wish I was having more sex
60. I like men that are really good kissers
61. That’s really important
62. I have kids
63. I don’t want anymore
64. Maybe? The Jury is still out on this
65. I’ve been in love 3 times
66. I Only say I love you when I mean it
67. I’ve only said it to 3 men
68. I like older men
69. Not OLD, older
70. I love a man that smells good
71. I like my man to look nice
72. But sometimes jeans and sneakers is what I am looking for
73. I like to be in control
74. I get really frustrated when things are out of my control
75. I use the word FUCK entirely to often
76. I like to be right
77. I can admit when I’m wrong
78. I hate ending relationships feeling Like I didn’t say all I had to say
79. Sometimes I say things that later I wish I hadn’t
80. Not cause I don’t mean it I just don’t like to hurt people
81. I can be a pain in the ass when it comes to that
82. I love, Love my parents
83. My mom is my Queen
84. I am still very much a “daddy’s girl”
85. They divorced when I was about 11
86. I am both their favorite’s
87. Everyone knows this
88. I’m at a critical point in my life
89. Still not sure what’s going to happen
90. I don’t want to make a mistake
91. My kids come first
92. Maybe one day I’ll have one more
93. I want a big house
94. with a white picket fence
95. I don’t think I’ll get it though
96. I want to be happy
97. I want to be loved
98. I’m not happy
99. now you know a lot about me
100. Maybe too much

Tuesday, August 09, 2005 


Hello my name is MSNHIM and I am a pickle addict…..Hello MSHIM.

I’ve always liked pickles. I would eat them at parties, if my kids took them of their burgers and on occasion with lunch but I have discovered the “saditty/swanky” pickle. This is not your average pickle. This pickle is sandwich sliced, it has a sweet and sour taste and it cost 3 dollars a jar!!!! Yeah for only a handful of pickles.

I got the urge to have a pickle yesterday so I went to the supermarket. I remember I had tasted these at a cookout and decided what the heck I’ll get these……BIG MISTAKE!!!!!!! I opened the jar at about 7pm yesterday by 7am this morning there were maybe 4 slices, the jar was pretty much empty. I can’t believe I ate a jar of pickles by myself and I am sitting here making a mental note to pick up some more when I get out of work. WTF?

This madness must stop. I am going to report to PA. Pickeleaters anonymous. Who knew you could become addicted to something as retarded as a pickle? I thought my addiction to coffee was bad but I get that … it’s the caffeine but a pickle????? I have reached a depressing low

Off to my pusher {the cashier} for more pickles! ;-o

Happy Tuesday!!!!!!

Monday, August 08, 2005 


Ok ,so I have worn a G-String/thong on the occasion when I am "dressing" the part for my man but I have never worn one longer than 10-20- minutes tops.

I went to a wedding this weekend and I had this oh so sexy dress but one problem, its so form fitting that my regular granny panties (don't laugh cause I love them) don't look right under the dress, major panty lines, so I figure I'll just go panty free right?

That made sense but then I starting thinking about my Mom and how she always said to make sure you have on good underwear in case your ever in an accident and have to be taken to the hospital. I mean if that happens they would think I was some type of loose chick cause I am walking around with no underwear so I decide I will just ware a g-sting to be on the safe side.

Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! What the hell was I thinking and why didn't someone tell me that shit is so uncomfortable. I know a lot of women who swear by them, that will only wear that type of underwear. Is it something you have to get use to??????

So here I am at the wedding (looking all kinds of sexy by the way) and all I can think about is that I have a string up my butt. I could not even enjoy myself cause it was so irritating. I contemplated going to the ladies room and taking It off but I kept hearing my mothers voice " always make sure you have good underwear on..." I can't take it. I sat there for five hours just trying to take my mind of the dam thing.

When I got home I wasn't even in the door yet and I was taking that shit off. I don't know how you ladies do it but I think I will stick with my granny panties.

{LMAO....... Comfortably rocking My granny panties.} :-)

Happy Monday!!!!!

Friday, August 05, 2005 

Young love

I was talking to my teenage niece about her relationship with her boyfriend of over a year and it made me think about being young and "in love". You think your going to marry and all that and things just don't go that way...

We all have them. That love that was true blue and for whatever reason things just got screwed up, you never tried, he never tried and it just ended. This is my story......

Let me set the seen. Its early 90’s I’m wearing my fire engine red lipstick (hey) and I’m about to have my first semi-adult relationship.

I remember the first time I saw HIM, I had all kinds of butterflies in my stomach and I just new he was the one. I was nervous though; I mean what if he didn’t like me. So I played it cool for a while. I tried to get him to notice me without being obvious. That didn’t really work. This went on for a few weeks, all this time I thought that I was being really
“ undercover” with my feeling for him but someone knew.

His really obnoxious pain in the ass cousin (who I always thought was crazy) knew and made it a point to let not only HIM know but also everyone in our little “ click” one day when we were all hanging out. OMG! I was completely embarrassed and if I wasn’t so red-in-the-face I would have given the cousin a piece of my mind but I had to go… I needed to regroup.. I need to erase this day from my mind.LOL

So later on that day HE says to me

Him: “ I hear you kinda like me”
Me: “Um your cousin has a big mouth”
Him: “So its not true”?
Me: “no its true… but your cousin has a big mouth!”

So the group of us decides to take a walk in the park (which back then was code for “ lets go make out in the park”) All these couples, walking. Some hand in hand. Not us. We were all the way in the back just talking.

So he had these really nice lips and I really wanted him to kiss me but he was kind of shy and I knew he wasn’t going to make the first move so I took a deep breath, said a small prayer, popped a stick of big red (the make out gum of the 90’s) and went in for the kill.

It was really, really, really Nice. (Hey I was sixteen Kissing was a big deal) So I kissed him then I walked away. HA! HA! Always leave them wanting more!

So to make a long story short that was the start of our “ relationship”. It lasted almost a year. Our breakup was do to a lot of the problems we where having at our respective homes and we were just too immature to deal with that and trying to make a "relationship" work so we just let it go.

When you a teenager in love you will sit on a stoop with your man in 20 degree weather, with your fingers numb and your nose running just to be able to spend some time (code word for making out) with him. Stairwells become your hang out spots and you live for HOOKY parties. ( where else can you get together without your parents finding out)

Yeah, those were good times {sigh}

So lets hear about your YOUNG LOVE.

Thursday, August 04, 2005 

The Women

I got some feed back yesterday that women can’t be trusted either, so I decided to write about the women that I will never trust again.

1. I should have known you were never a “ real” friend. You were suppose to be my girl and when the shit came down you sided against me after the million and one times I had your Back. When your world was falling apart and you needed to talk at 4 in the morning my ass was there. When you where having problems trying to have a baby I offered to carry for you. But when shit got ugly you showed me your true colors .You and your oh so saddity self can keep it moving cause I stop giving a dam about you years ago. If It wasn’t for “family ties “ that bind us Id tell you that your a stuck up bitch and cut your ass off completely. Don’t forget where you came from cause you never know when you might end up back there.

2. Your another one. After I cried with you when your sons father denied him, took you to get prenatal care, explain how WIC works and pretty much feed your as through your entire pregnancy you let a man come between us and what did that man give you in return for my friendship, HEART BREAK. He cheated not once not twice but 4 times in your own bed. Yeah I guess that’s worth more than my friendship. NOT!!!!!!, But do you baby cause I was fortunate enough to find out who you really were before you did the faul shit you pull on your other friends to me. So I guess I should say thank you.

These chicks made it hard for me to trust women and to have girlfriends but fortunately for Me I learned who my real friends are. Although I don’t have many the ones that I have are true blue. Love you guys.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005 

My Take on Men

SIDE NOTE: This post is not intended to offend men in any way shape or form it is merely my take on the men I have dealt with. This is only MY opinion.

Lets start with the first main man in my life. Dear old Dad

1. My Dad was an adulterer and Con Artist
He would try to sell you a bridge if he could and had a hard time keeping it in his pants. Now don’t get me wrong I still love him unconditionally, He’s my Daddy but the lessons I learned from him were
1. If it sounds to good to be true… it is.
2. You can’t trust men.

Moving on to the many boyfriends I have had in my life. {I’ll generalized since they were all pretty much all the same}

1. When he is not with you he’s with the next chick
2. You can’t trust men

Now the man I married

1. If you treat him like a king and he takes you for granted, its your fault cause you spoiled him {yeah that’s a quote) BUT
2. Maybe, just maybe I can trust HIM… all be it cautiously. So far he hasn't let me down in the honesty department .

So there you have it. I don’t trust men cause all the men in my life (Except my husband) have proven to be liars, cheats and con artist… or they take you for granted and who the hell can tolerate that.LOL


Monday, August 01, 2005 


By now you have notice my new look, It was not done on purpose. I thought I broke my blog! LMAO

I wanted to list the people I read daily and tried to figure out how to set that up. I ask a friend I though was computer savy enough( Boy was I wrong) to help and she just made it worse ( wont be asking her for help again.LOL) I had to change my look but I like it. It took a minute but finally I got it.

Pink Positive!!!!!!!!


From lovers to Roomates -Part II

First I would like to thank everyone who responded with advice concerning my last post, you don't know it but it helped a lot. Thanks so much fellow bloggers.

Much love to you all!

Ok so taking everyone's advice including my own I had " the talk" with the husband last night and amazingly things were going ok. He ask for yet "another" chance but my heart isn't in it and I don't want to pretend anymore.

To say he was not please about that is an understatement. He was pissed which I believe brings you to say things you wouldn't ordinarily say. Some words were thrown back and forth and rather than the quite "exit" I was hoping for what ended up happening was I told him to "leave" and I wasn't nice about it.

So when I got up the next day I was ok with everything. The only part that made me a little nervous was what to tell the kids... I never found out.

He shows up at my door at noon asking to talk. He ask me to give him some time to find some place to stay, by the look of him I believe he slept in the car.

Now I know Im stupid, week even but I cant let the father of my children sleep in the car so now we are living in the same house but now in separate bedrooms.

I have officially become my parents! That is how they lived for the last 3 years of their marriage.